Ian Gibbs

Some people have relatives too many to count. Some have a few; some have no known relatives. Many do not even know their parents and, as such, find themselves alone and unconnected in this vast universe. Ian Gibbs, born 24 years ago in Victoria Jubilee Hospital, downtown Kingston, has only a piece of paper, his birth certificate, to tell who he is.

Ian: "Most of the time I don't like to talk about it because it sort of hurt my feelings when I know I don't have anyone around me as a mother figure or father figure ... I didn't find the love and connection with a family growing up as a young man."

So, most of his life has been spent wondering who his parents and relatives are, why they had abandoned him, and whether he would ever find them. And it was never a good feeling.

Ian: "It makes me feel unwanted. It's not really good ... even when Mother's Day and Father's Day come up, I tend to not like those days because I don't have anyone to say 'Happy Mother's Day' or Happy Father's Day' to."

He's a grown man, but he still yearns for the day when he comes face to face with the man and woman who brought him into this world. His father's name is not on his birth certificate, but he learned through queries that he was called Edland. Not much information about his mother, Maxine Cameron, is on his birth certificate, which makes his efforts to find his relatives more difficult.

Ian: "I still want to find them, no matter what the circumstances or problems there are ... because the need to know who they are is very strong, although they have abandoned me."

Now living in Mandeville, Manchester, his first recollection of his existence was at Strathmore Gardens Place of Safety. He didn't know then, but the home is located in Spanish Town, St Catherine. He was later transferred to Mount Olivet Boys' Home, near Walderston, Manchester, where he realised he was not living with his own family.

"I was angry because, without a mother and a father, I didn't have anyone to look up to or turn to," he said. He might be angry, but he's not bitter, as he said he would accept any explanation that they give him, but he needs to know what happened.

Ian: "I would love them (nevertheless) even though they didn't give me love. I just want to know what really went wrong, why they didn't keep me."

He grew up at Mount Olivet and, despite the absence of blood relatives in his life, Ian has turned out to be a decent young man, with dreams of having his own family.

Determined

"I'm really a determined young man, and I want the best out of life, so I try to go at it and try to achieve as much as I want, and, no matter what, I don't think anything will ever stop me from becoming a good person."

Mount Olivet Primary School, Spaldings High School (Clarendon) and Portmore HEART Academy (St Catherine) are the institutions he attended. At Portmore, he studied construction technology up to level two.

Ian: "I've always wanted to be going ahead, not to fall down ... I try to uplift myself ... at school I didn't really keep friends that give me bad influences because I know where I am coming from and I know I don't have the family background."

His yearning to meet his parents is so strong that he once dreamed that they were reunited. In the dream, they were having dinner around a table, eating and having a merry time. He woke up to face the reality and the feeling of being unwanted.

Should he hear from any of them and they decide to meet, how would he react? "I think I will be crying, overwhelmed or speechless ... I would run and give them a hug, and say 'I love you, no matter what'."

And at what stage would he ask for an explanation?

"It wouldn't be the same day. I would have to give them some time," he said, laughing.

paul.williams@gleanerjm.com